I had a dream. I was reading my poems to you, my face hidden by my leather bound notebook. You were loving me and the sanctity of the moment. You couldn’t seem to keep your eyes away from the light haloing my flushed face. I have never felt more innocent and bold at the same time. I wanted to cup your cheeks with my hands and just gaze into your eyes all night. But you needed to hear my voice. So, I read my poems to you one by one and filled our room with whispers of love and longing, of beauty and hope, of passion and honesty. We both claimed something that was ours and sailed away on calm silken seas, ready to brave tempests together…never to feel lost and alone again. ❤
Ed. July 2, 2019 | Originally written: What now feels like a lifetime ago
In honor of a departed friend’s upcoming birthday, this post is a memory of an awesome day we had, 13 years ago. I originally posted this on my Livejournal blog.
Nov. 10, 2006 I was so excited to see Alyjane & Carla again after such a looong time. 🙂 Aly & I scoured both NBS and Powerbooks of Megamall and Shang before having lunch and we were later joined by Carla at the first Cine Europa screening of the day, “Karo and God Himself”.
This film was simply a joy to watch. Karo made me laugh with her stubborn determination in getting “God” to make her wish come true, and she almost moved me to tears as she learned a lot of valuable lessons and developed a pure friendship with him. Little Resi Reiner (Karo) was able to charm the audiences with her innocence, humor, and wit.
After Cine Europa, we went ice skating, which I haven’t done for 3 years. We were laughing at ourselves because we looked funny–3 child-like girls all giddy and giggly with their hands linked together. We remembered the first time we did this together, and the memory that stood out the most was of us slipping and falling and just laughing it off, not caring how silly we all looked as we were getting acquainted with our skating legs. I was back to 0 again since I forgot how to glide on ice without hogging the bars. But I still haven’t forgotten the mixed feelings of bliss, excitement, and fear when I’m learning how to skate. I was having so much fun, I didn’t notice that I already had bruises because of the tight skates. After I got home and I’ve already rested my bruised feet, I had a crazy realization that love is like learning how to skate on ice. It’s an experience that makes you feel excited and giddy, and your heart race faster. (The moment I was finally able to face my fear of falling by letting go of the bars and gliding on ice–incomparable. I felt like I was flying and that anything was possible.) Of course, there’s still that slight fear that you might slip or fall, but once you get the hang of it, you feel pure bliss–as if you’re light and soaring on air, oblivious to everything else. You will still fall and you will feel a bit embarassed, but you will muster all your strength to get up and start again, determined to make everything go smoothly and not to fall again. You will get bruises too but does that stop you from skating? Of course not. You do your best and hopefully you perfect it this time. But when do you finally stop? You stop when you’re so tired and your feet feels sore and every glide feels painful, or when you discover that you already have a lot of bruises from skating too hard. ❤
*This is my tribute to all the phenomenal women in my life, to those who have and continue to inspire me, and to those I have yet to meet.
Cheers to those girls who had to grow up a little earlier than their peers. Those girls who were thrust with responsibility and old woman’s wisdom when they should’ve been playing house without a care in the world. Those girls who grew into independence and resiliency and wore them well into adulthood. I see you and admire your beauty shaped by the years of inner struggles, some still ongoing, and the battles you survived. Your brave hearts that still give, despite past hurts and coming up empty more times than you want to admit. You carry the weight of the world in your arms strong enough for burdens, but always soft for the ones you love. Cheers to you, to us, because we aren’t celebrated or appreciated enough often by those around us. But we can acknowledge each other, wish each other “Blessed be” when our paths cross, and say we are phenomenal women. We are the pillars of love, hope, and strength in a world that will always look towards our light.